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Over-protective is evil

Last night, communication broke down with my D & M, once again. Repeatedly, they failed to realize I was not happy bound to my birth country. Weather could not convince them. Quality of living (I know that is too general) could not convince them either. They just want me to live THEIR life and not my own life. If that were the case, why was I born to this world and given my own lungs to breathe. I could jolly well be stuck to a external life support and breathing apparatus (them) and just wait till the day I die.

Life without heart is sad. Life without soul is equally the same. I am almost vivid clear that I will gain more happiness if my body and my heart (and souls) stays together. A fallen entity means failure, and I will not make the same mistake again.

D&M, sorry if I have broken your heart. It is your refusal to believe in me, your refusal to have trust in me, refusal to see that happiness can be mine by a simple act of being able to enjoy what I want to do, who I am with, and where I am, even when it means not able to stay close to you. If not being seen by you defines an act of losing filial piety, then mark me down with those hideous words. Deep in my heart, I know I am not. I can only choose a distant way of expressing filial piety, a way you consider NOT. I know you are not wrong but I can bravely stand on my grounds that I am not wrong too. As I have told D previously, if we cannot share a same vision and perspective, both of us will lose the battle altogether. You will not lose me by letting me go. Rather, you will win a part of my heart if you can understand that whatever I am doing now is to pave a better path for my own family. Happiness is not $. Quality of life is not $ either. It is all about an individual feeling comfortable in the state of mind and heart.

I watched Curious George this morning, taking one leaf from a book. The kite. It sounds cliché but it rings my heart. The purpose of a kite is to let it fly. If you refuse to release the line and wants to have total control, then a kite can never be a kite. It will not fly and merely be a decoration. If you want to tie it with a line and allow it to fly, then manage it with good control. The looser you hold the line, the better the kite flies in the environment. The extreme will be a total let-go (kite flies and be gone forever) which in this analogy is not the end-goal.

Not in the mood for Chinese New Year

Seriously, I am not in the mood for Chinese New Year this year. I just hope this will be the last CNY I have to be in Singapore. Whoever reads this and knows me and my family, please don't give me away, just in case I don't get a chance to get out of Singapore and DUH!!!, it is going to be so darn embarrassing I said that. Anyway, I won't be celebrating much since I NEED to WORK. BLEH! Yes. Public sector. Work-life balance. BS. Just pure unlucky I am one of those three co-ordinating members in my organisation that are supposed to work with our HQ after the recent Resilience Budget. If you do not know, after the Budget comes the debate and preparation of answers to questions raised. Turnaround of each question - 24 hrs!

I really need to stay resilient! Almost going crazy.

Borrowing money is a bad thing ?

BOA, Washington Mutual(WaMu - everybody says Wa-Moo), Wachovia - familiar names to us as we see those names whenever we go past Sunnyvale financial district in California.

Local and foreign media have put so much focus on the financial crisis and analysts have provided us with details of the causes and effects.

Why were Asian banks not hurt as badly as Western (US, and European banks) ? Many attributed to the way money was spent by the banks. If you go deeper, it is really in the culture and education we were nurtured in since young.

As an Asian brought up in a traditional family in Singapore, "borrowing" money is typically seen as a bad action. It means you are "poor". It means you are "not doing well". Mom used to say:

"Don't take on loans and incur the interest rates. It's not worth it".

"Pay off credit cards bills all at once. Don't delay payment and get fined for it. Don't pay by installments and get charged interests."

"If possible, pay the bills (that can include BIG items like house and automobile) upfront".

So, is taking loan really a BAD THING ? Yes & No. Of course, thanks to the conservative teachings of Dad and Mom - I consider myself (and is) a risk-averse person when it comes to financial planning/investment. Also to the point I could not really understand - when some of the people I know (not so close that I could call them "friends") chose to pay 0% interest installment when they purchase a washing machine and a refrigerator from Courts. But when thought more objectively, maybe I can understand why. To them, it is not a matter of being seen "poor" or "rich" when they go by installments. They are using this ever-popular evil (especially in this turmoil times) word called LEVERAGE.

Similar to the Western culture (I don't know about Europe) eg in the USA, BEING IN DEBT may not necessarily be a bad thing. And they don't call it DEBT, they call it LEVERAGE. That is how people like you and me use loans to build credit. Till today, I don't know the specific dynamics behind this but put in simply - if you were to purchase an automobile today (say eg. a new Toyota Corolla cost only about US$16K), some people will advise you to go on a car loan even if you could pay the whole lump sum upfront. Because when you take a loan, and are able to re-pay the loan, your credit rating goes up? Then in future, when you want to borrow money for something more critical or important, you could get a loan more easily? Something like that. I told you I am not an expert in this!

Too much of a good thing becomes evil ! The cause of this crisis is the result of OVER-LEVERAGE!! I think the"ang-mohs" need to learn about being thrifty from Asians and Asians need to open up their concept of "borrowing" at the same time!

Then, all of us will be smarter in future.

New York Times, then now Malay Mail. Yippee!

I chose this site to "announce" it first, since this site has LOWER (secret) traffic following, compared to my main blog at Teczcape - An Escape to Food. Freakonomics.

In fact, I just had a cooking post up in Teczcape - An Escape to Food and did not want to create another new post so soon.

OK. A-hem....my interview with Malay Mail is up! ^o^ I am The Food Escapist as featured in Malay Mail, 9 October 2008.

This "light" must have followed me, after my snippet feature in New York Times (online 30 Sept 2008, print 1 Oct 2008).

Hooray! At least something to brighten me up before I start the dreary work week from next week onwards.

Contrasting views all a matter of perspectives

My Dad is going to jump at this - "S'pore top choice for expat parents" published in My Paper, 9 October 2008. It re-emphasized his point that Singapore......"is very good what ...a lot of foreigners want to come here..."

Yes & No. If your automobile and gas are paid for, your living (meals and transport) expenses are paid for, housing paid for, your children's education are (partially?)paid for, your medical bills paid for, who would NOT say - S'pore is TOP choice ?

TODAY, also 9 October 2008, had another report on "Here today, gone tomorrow" of expat children. I have no question about a good early education they are able to receive in S'pore. Most importantly, they can make use of this opportunity here to gain perspectives on the Asian culture, learn another language - all these eventually help them to gain access to MORE (note: I did not say "better") opportunities.

Get the missing link of these two tabloids? So, expat parents and children are just here to tap and make use of the good system and opportunity, but will eventually leave one day...back to their home country or somewhere better.

So, Dad (I wish) should know going out from Singapore does not mean not returning. Singapore is but so limited in the kind of industries it is trying to nurture. Other than IT, biotech (maybe) and oil & gas, I wonder where will all the engineering(civil, mechanical) grads go to - take some MBA and go into investment banking, probably ? And unfortunately, Singapore does not have many relevant opportunities for hubby. If other countries "need" his skills/knowledge, just like how Singapore "need" them, then we are just following the footsteps of those foreigners whom you cited as your example, right?

More convincing to be done to open up their perspectives.

And of course, still thankful we are alive today, to keep dreams burning.